Almost needless to say, I was like many Americans out there and was defined by my job. I was the "soap lady" to so many for so many years, that now, I'm a bit adrift. Actually I have enough personal care items stashed that I could probably still be seen as the "soap lady" but no bother, that is not the point.
The uncertainty that my financial situation is precarious at best does not faze me, as both my husband and I have dealt with these issues in Dallas, and not only did we make it out alive, we learned again and again that God will always provide, and in the most resourceful of ways. It has more to do with identity, self-worth and the knowledge that now working hard has to extend to my home life, my personal life and my imaginary world.
Yes, I said imaginary world. The world I created as a child never ceased to exist, I just stopped telling people about it. If only this world could escape my head and make it to paper, I would feel more at peace. Now I have the opportunity to be re-explore who I can be and who I am and one of the benefits of living so close to the woods and so far from "civilized" life and the fact that I severely limit my power of connections these days, that my re-definition of self will not be noted by many, but only a special few and in the safety and circle of love.
So cheers, and a toast and a Mazel for new beginnings, old continuations and some fat burning.
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